BORIS BURDA: How Not to Forget Something Important
Photo by David Valentine on Unsplash
ATTENTION — QUESTION!
Dutch flight attendant Esther Sturrus, who works for the globally renowned airline KLM, shared that she recommends her colleagues place one of their uniform shoes in the hotel room safe as soon as they check in. Why?
ATTENTION — CORRECT ANSWER!
When getting ready for work, you’ll inevitably need to put on your uniform shoes—without them, you won’t be allowed on duty. Under the shoe, Esther Sturrus places all the necessary documents in advance, which must also be taken along, as forgetting even one small piece of paper would mean not being allowed on the plane.
A YOUNG PROFESSION
Recently, the internet buzzed with tips from Dutch flight attendant Esther Sturrus, who was working for the globally renowned airline KLM. One of her suggestions seemed surprising to many at first. Not everyone understood why she recommends placing one of your uniform shoes in the hotel room safe as soon as you check in.
What could be the benefit of such an eccentric practice for representatives of this young but already prestigious profession? In crafts with centuries-old histories, unusual traditions often remain from bygone eras, but where would flight attendants acquire such customs? After all, the profession itself hasn’t even existed for a century.
The term stewardess emerged slightly earlier, in 1907, when the Linguistic Commission of the Union of German Pilots recommended adopting maritime terminology for aviation. This is how commanding airplanes became the role of captains, charting routes fell to navigators, and passenger service naturally followed suit.
In the spirit of this decision, the managers of what is now United Airlines who decided to entrust passenger care during flights to charming woman named Ellen Church — their first employee in this role — a stewardess. On May 15, 1930, she embarked on her debut flight from San Francisco to Chicago.
Her job description involved a host of responsibilities. Among other duties, she was required to swat all the flies on the plane, wind the clocks onboard, polish the shoes of any passenger requesting the service, and under no circumstances allow anyone to toss cigarette butts out of the plane windows (could they really be opened from the inside?).
CHALLENGING DUTIES
At first, the job of a stewardess was even more challenging than it is today. For example, modern flight attendants are not required to be familiar with train schedules. However, in the past, they were expected to advise passengers on how to reach their destination by land if a plane made an emergency landing due to bad weather.
Not so long ago in the U.S., every stewardess was required to carry a watch and a geographic map. How else could she determine whether to serve alcohol to a passenger? What if the plane was flying over a state where alcohol sales were prohibited? The map could also be shown to an unhappy passenger denied a drink — a gesture unlikely to make them any less upset.
Dealing with passengers remains a challenge. In Hong Kong, flight attendants were even trained in Wing Chun — a form of kung fu suited for confined spaces — due to the frequent occurrence of unruly passengers. This is no small feat, considering that stewardesses are usually selected for their pleasant appearance and are neither towering giants (though not tiny either, as they need to reach overhead compartments with ease).
But things can get truly dire. Take, for example, the case of a plane that took off late and couldn’t land at Ben Gurion Airport before Shabbat. Some Hasidic passengers began assaulting the flight attendants, demanding an immediate landing — anywhere but before Friday sunset! Such bravery — unafraid of flight attendants! No wonder the Israeli Supreme Court ruled to draft them into the military. Why were they so resistant?
Still, stewardesses manage. They are often quick-witted. When a stewardess asked Muhammad Ali to fasten his seatbelt, he decided to show off and replied, «Superman doesn’t need a seatbelt!» The stewardess calmly responded, «Superman doesn’t need an airplane either». The champion buckled up — just in case.
THROUGH THEIR OWN EYES
This is an outsider’s perspective. But what do flight attendants think of themselves? At the very least, they can easily recognize one another. Someone who answers the phone not with «Hello!» but by stating their name, who always adds their employee ID number when filling out any document, or who, as a passenger on a plane, instinctively closes every overhead bin they pass — clearly a colleague.
In a flight attendant’s apartment, you’ll likely find a row of suitcases in all possible sizes — usually on the balcony, though the owner probably doesn’t remember where she bought them. Her wallet is always full of coins, but tipping might be tricky since the money comes from countless countries. And if you ask her what day of the week it is, chances are she won’t know.
Her phone also holds amusing clues. Most of the messages from her carrier are about arriving in a new country. Her social media is filled with holiday greetings — since catching her in person is nearly impossible. And her phone is packed with alarms set for every imaginable time.
Dating a flight attendant is no easy task. Flowers aren’t a great gift; she’ll be gone long before the bouquet wilts, and she can’t water potted plants either. Meeting up is only possible on her day off — whenever that might be — and even then, she’ll probably spend it catching up on sleep. Besides, how can you plan a date when her schedule is only known a few days in advance?
When guests leave a flight attendant’s apartment, she wishes every one of them, without exception, «Have a nice day, goodbye!» And when she leaves her own apartment or hotel room for work, she must be extra careful. She needs to take a pile of documents with her, and forgetting even one can mean being barred from the flight. How does she keep track of it all?
HELPING YOUR MEMORY
This issue is an old one and not limited to flight attendants. The Persian king Darius despised the defiant Athenians and didn’t want to forget about them — so he kept a special servant who followed him everywhere, periodically saying, «Darius, remember the Athenians!» It must have worked — such persistence could make anyone hate its cause.
A similar method was used by Count de Saint-Simon, whose servant would wake him each morning with the words, «Get up, Count, great deeds await you!» But for kings and counts, finding an extra servant is easy. What about ordinary people? Some figured out that tying a knot in a handkerchief could serve as a memory aid. That worked, too — if they didn’t forget what the knot was supposed to remind them of.
An ordinary alarm clock could also jog your memory. These ranged from ancient Chinese versions, where a metal ball embedded in a candle would drop when the wax burned down, to mechanical clocks, including wristwatches and pocket watches. Do you remember those giant keychains from hotel keys? Those were also reminders — to ensure you didn’t accidentally take the key with you.
Today, reminders have become simpler — every mobile phone comes equipped with apps to alert you ahead of important events and even specify what they are. There are plenty of such apps, and even specialized websites to help you find the one that suits you best. But what if the timing of the event is unclear?
For instance, you could do as Esther Sturrus does. She places one of her uniform shoes in the safe — without which she wouldn’t be allowed to work — underneath which lie all her essential documents. This ensures she won’t forget them! A clever trick for a job that’s not only responsible but physically demanding — the trolley a flight attendant pushes down the aisle weighs over 100 kilograms.
Only a smart person could come up with something like this. No wonder so many people are eager to court flight attendants! Roman Abramovich’s first wife was a stewardess, and her Dutch colleague recently married the Australian Prime Minister. However, flight attendants often respond to admirers with, «Fly with our airline, and we’ll see each other soon!» — and they mean it.
