THE BENEFITS OF FRIENDS: learn to befriend in childhood
Rodney Smith. Gary and Henry Chasing Butterfly, 1996 / thephotogallery.se
Adolescent friendship plays a crucial role in a person’s health and social well-being as they grow up. Recent scientific data published in Frontiers in Developmental Psychology support this.
FRIENDS ARE GOOD FOR YOUR HEALTH
Our need for friendship is linked to brain chemistry. Interacting with friends promotes the production of neurotransmitters like oxytocin, serotonin, and dopamine. Oxytocin is responsible for feelings of attachment, serotonin for pleasure, and dopamine for mood.
The brain encourages friendliness by boosting feelings of «euphoria» while reducing the risk of cardiovascular diseases and depression. Interestingly, we are very similar in this respect to our distant relatives, the primates. They also want to know how to form friendships, and this skill appears to be a crucial factor in natural selection.
The journal Frontiers in Microbiology published research indicating that rhesus macaques can socially transmit bacteria, which, through the gut-brain axis, impact the species’ evolution. Less sociable and friendly monkeys have a less diverse microbiome, suffer from more illnesses, experience higher stress levels, and die younger.
AT LEAST SIX FRIENDS IS IDEAL!
As a higher primate, humans are inherently social beings. We spend a considerable amount of energy and effort to make friends. According to statistics, building close relationships takes an average of about 200 hours. For our species, friendship is a marker of social and physical well-being, while social isolation is a marker of social dysfunction, illness, and premature death.
The famous principle «quality over quantity» doesn’t quite apply to friendships, even if we believe otherwise. In fact, the more friends a person has, the better their mental and physical health. Of course, determining the optimal number of friends is not easy and varies from person to person.
However, studies from 2020 revealed that those with six or more friends enjoy better health throughout life compared to those with fewer than six. That said, this refers to what is generally considered «true friendship». The quality of our close circle is just as important as the quantity.
LISTEN TO YOUR BRAIN — MAKE TRUE FRIENDS!
According to PLOS One, about 50% of our friendships are not mutual. Whether you are aware of this or not, your brain chemistry will still react to these mixed feelings with a sense of discomfort and unease.
Identifying a fake friend isn’t too difficult — even with frequent and intense interactions, they will never be genuinely happy for your successes.
Making new friends becomes increasingly difficult as we age. According to research from Oxford University, our social circle narrows significantly after the ages of 20–25, which is generally considered a psychological norm.
It is assumed that with age, people become wiser, more selective, and start to evaluate things differently. However, this, too, is highly individual. Introverts, who are more sensitive to dopamine, tend to tire more quickly from social interactions compared to extroverts, whose brains produce more dopamine.
FRIENDSHIP VARIES AROUND THE WORLD
People in different parts of the world form friendships differently. The University of Michigan conducted a study involving 323,200 participants from 99 countries to explore the influence of sociocultural factors on friendship.
They discovered some universal patterns. Across all cultures, friendship helped mitigate the negative social consequences of a lower level of education. Everywhere, women valued friendship more than men and were better at deriving benefits from it. Elderly individuals who viewed friendship as a fundamental value generally reported higher levels of happiness.
Interestingly, individualistic and collectivistic cultures value friendship in different ways. In individualistic societies, social and physical well-being is more closely linked to friendship, while in collectivistic cultures, it is more associated with family ties.
EARLY EXPERIENCES CAN SHAPE YOUR DESTINY!
Emily Shah from the University of Arkansas, the author of an article in Frontiers in Developmental Psychology, believes that adolescence is crucial for our social development, as this is when friendships form.
Studying a group of 184 American schoolchildren, researchers found that social acceptance becomes important at ages 13–14, and by ages 17–18, having a close circle of friends takes precedence. Later, when the participants were 28–30 years old, the researchers assessed their physical and mental health, job satisfaction, self-esteem, experiences of aggression, and more.
The findings were clear: the quality of friendships in adolescence significantly impacts a person’s health and well-being in adulthood.
Friendship provides young people with one of their first experiences of consensual intimate relationships, laying the groundwork for future social interactions, responses to stressful transitions, and relationships within the family and workplace.
Original research:
- Friendships, Subjective Age, and Life Satisfaction of Women in Midlife
- Are You Your Friends’ Friend? Poor Perception of Friendship Ties Limits the Ability to Promote Behavioral Change
- Having good friendships may make for a healthier gut microbiome
- Adolescent close friendships, self-perceived social acceptance, and peer-rated likeability as predictors of wellbeing in young adulthood
